My Digital Diary

December 5, 2007

A Rat Knocking on my Door

Rats are the most intelligent animals I have seen but not read.This impression is not the result of the HollyWood flick “Ratatoullie”.Sanjay dutt had a Major saab visting him everynight at sharp 12:30 or 1 am in his 10*10 ka flat.The Major knew the inmate ,the various entry,exit and all the konakopcha of his terriotry ;also never missed its duty to make rounds every midnight.

I occupy a falt on 3rd floor of a 40 -50 yr’ s old building built by the CentralGovernment of India.The place is clean on 3 sides baring the west side of the building facing railway station which has some good filth surrounding it.On a perfect night sharp at 1:30 am ..we have a major from the westzone visiting us.I never thought that he was capable of climbing Everest.The bastard is an uninvited guest breaking to my home when the whole world sleeps.He was a casual visitor until his fingerprints was noticed by my Mom.My computer cable was churned like a bubblegum.The last possible target was the rice bag which was untouched as he was well behaved and gave us that much privacy to keep away from my bedroom.

Does he has a timex watch and a direction compass gifted by Jack Sparrow?
The little bastard has won my faith surely that he is clever than my class five teacher.
The approximate distance to climb 3rd floor will be arnd 20 meters or so..Also our windows are all protected by old net grill fashion.But the ventilator were always open.He exactly new the place ,the window and the time for arrival and departure.
Day before yest ,my dad blocked the ventilator with a woodden board also the opening in the kitchen next to the exhaust fan.That night i was awake and  was desperatley waiting for my Major Saab.Exactly at 1:30am he knocked the now blocked ventilator board.He wasn’t aware that …i was waiting for him,but as a casual observer.”Main kanoon ko apne haath main nahi leta” .
And yes..I fear rats.they are so quick and dirty,difficult to trace and blackish.My sis almost had an eyelock wid him once and she screamed even when no one was at home.Coming back..He kept knocking as if i will welcome him in.Later he desperately tried the entry from the kitchen which was again in vain.I kept marvelling at his judgement about directions of all entry and exits.We offered him poison inside wheat floor but again he was not a local havaldar..he was after all a well trained Major.He could smell and reject the tasteless ball.

So much for the him ,that we informed other residents about the adventure of Majorsaab and how we succeeded in  making him helpless to cross the laxman rekha.
Is there nothing to eat out there on indian roads that these scum are approaching the terrace floor?What wud be the condition of our grnd floor families.?
That day i felt like buying a sniper and making a kill out of all those underground goons.Even cats fear them as i dont see them making a move in their area.We have some stray dogs who are good for nothing.I wish they some how evolve to eat rats.
I will wait 2night for Majorsaab again .Lets see how many days he keeps on trying to break in my apartment.(2day is the 3rd day)

He should understand that getting a visa for my apartment is not a cake walk.Am not sure wether he will give up.He is a true fighter thou.We need such people with same determination and accuracy to run our nation.Anyway..ppl running the nation are also Rats.They eat eat eat till they die.They reproduce,reproduce and churn the legs of every table standing.A politician is a bigger rat who fears no one.One can close all the ventilators but he can still smother you.we are like cockroaches for them.Ample in size and quantity.Ready to eat like 2 minute noodles.We make a healthy diet and we choose them after all.That rat and this rat.Rats everywhere!!!

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17 Comments »

  1. you know wat…this post is amazingly jhakkas!!…u wrote is so casually abt a RAT…and it turned out to be a gem !! Saala…that rat must have been proud of himself…and ya when we talked abt Ratatouille last nite…I was sure that a post on rat was coming up ! well, rats are pain in the ass when they cause trouble in our home…but they are so cute…man ! they do it so innocently…i mean atleast they look innocent…or they make themselves look innocent taking their smartness into account. I wonder why u named them as Major saab…they r actually ‘Lasoons’ !! hahahaha…for the post !

    Comment by Anoop — December 6, 2007 @ 2:53 am

  2. Hello… Good post. Especially the last few lines about the politico stuff. While being simple, it did hit below the belt.

    Comment by Sam — December 6, 2007 @ 4:55 am

  3. Thnks bhops..
    Usne dimag ka dahi kar diya hain..he comes everynight and tries to break the window..Seriuosly he is a “Lasson” ..let me feed him lasoon once..lekin usmain daring hain..manna padega baap!!!
    And this post was only possible bcos everyone in my home was taking about that rat..Usne sabke dil aur dimag pe azagah bana liya tha..Ratatoullie i saw long before…

    hey awaiting for u r post on American work culture…

    Comment by nitin — December 6, 2007 @ 7:24 am

  4. @sam..thnka man..welcome here..
    I never thought to twist the tale towards politicians in the end but somehow it was unavoidable..

    Comment by nitin — December 6, 2007 @ 7:27 am

  5. hahaha..
    rats r rats..bt anyway u turn everything into politics..!!! 😉

    Comment by Ramya — December 6, 2007 @ 7:33 am

  6. N BTW, have added ur link in my blogroll.

    Comment by Sam — December 6, 2007 @ 7:59 am

  7. cool…But,SAM..where’s the link to your blog???

    Comment by nitin — December 6, 2007 @ 10:44 am

  8. http://spitvenom.wordpress.com/

    Comment by Sam — December 6, 2007 @ 3:47 pm

  9. would u believe that a rat had made a rather cosy permanent residence inside my friends computer cabinet?
    and it was a gentle soul it only ate food and my friends logitech mouse wheel rubber – not the cables

    there was a tiny mouse in my house which appeared at night and freaked us out try as we might we couldnt getrid of him finally when he was big enough and all grown up i cornered my major saab
    in the passage and a whack at his nose meant he was almost breathing his last …
    phew that was good exercise

    Comment by Prax — December 7, 2007 @ 8:33 pm

  10. @prax..
    Thats really exciting…is he still living in his cabinet?

    Heheh…well, really they are not easy to catch..you have good experience of killing rats it seems.. 🙂 Once everyone in our family were trying to chase 1 damn mice..i was with a broom..mom ..dad everyone loaded with weapons of mass destruction…He was killed that day…
    You wont believe just 5 minutes before Major saab was knocking on my blocked window..He still thinks there’s a way to get in..poor rat..!!!

    Comment by nitin — December 7, 2007 @ 9:12 pm

  11. Wah! kya story hai rats ke upar. Cool! man I enjoyed reading it. The climax of the post turned to be on politicians. That was a good turn and a it is so true. Good one…

    Comment by Srini — December 11, 2007 @ 9:32 pm

  12. @srini..thnks..yaar its not a fictional one.. 😉

    Comment by nitin — December 12, 2007 @ 6:53 pm

  13. well we sealed the box witch gave him a hint that he was no more a guest..

    Comment by prax — December 15, 2007 @ 3:34 am

  14. rats are truly intelligent and their intelligence is very close match to humans’ and hence many of the behavioural psychologists study their behaviour in the experimental laboratories and draw analogies to human behaviour! and so is their physiology. hence all drugs are first tested on them and then they test on humans if found tolerated by rats. and many of the genetic engineering experiments are also conducted on rats and then trie din humans. thus they are a big help to scientists.

    there are also people who keep rats as pets. ofcourse, these are a separate breed of rats and their degree of domestication depends on how many previous forefathers of it were also domesticated! and they say that these domesticated rats pose no more health hazards than any other house pets like dogs or cats!

    and rats get afflicted with diseases similar to what affects humans. i have read about rats with diabetes!

    in lab experiments the psychologists have found out that they are intelligent in exploiting the loopholes present there and go about with their business in reaching their targets! and they are amazing at finding their way through complicated maze and they have smart memories!

    don’t say, poor rats. they are intelligent rats!

    Comment by latha vidyaranya — December 21, 2007 @ 12:17 pm

  15. Latha,.. very elaborate and interesting..Thnks for the info..
    betwn my post was about a rat troubling me and my family. 🙂

    Comment by nitin — December 21, 2007 @ 7:51 pm

  16. nitin, i understand that your family is being troubled by this rat. my sympathies. at the same time, if we understand their intelligent strategies, the troubles that they create can turn into awe and appreciation! that doesn’t mean your troubles are anyway lessened. i am all for trapping them in a mouse-trap and releasing them out far far away in an uninhabited area. live and let live 🙂

    Comment by latha vidyaranya — December 27, 2007 @ 4:16 am

  17. I just happened to visit this blog when i searched the keyword (or phrase) “better than Mumbai” .Nice one yaar….keep it up

    Comment by dinesh — January 9, 2008 @ 9:02 am


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